Being "My Own Kind" of Dad

I think every prospective parent should watch the movie Parenthood before getting pregnant. The film could easily be called Fatherhood, since the main characters are the dads. That movie makes clear some central truths about fathering:

• It is like a roller coaster.
• You can’t know for sure how your actions will affect your children.
• You can guarantee that your actions do affect your children.

My favorite line from Parenthood is when Keanu Reeves’ character Tod says, “You need license to buy a dog or drive a car. Hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they’ll let any (expletive deleted) a**hole be a father.”
Family professionals play a key role in helping a man commit to being an involved and effective father. But such professionals often miss the importance of a bit of crass humor--the kind guys like, right?

Tod’s bit of crass humor explains the biggest dilemma a new father faces: No one trained me for this job. The baby doesn’t come with an operator’s manual, plug-and-play attachments, or downloadable upgrades.

Despite this, dads today have more freedom than ever to take “nontraditional” approaches to fathering. Many men take time away from their careers to stay home with the baby while their partners return to the workplace. Other men work part-time or telecommute so they can commune with baby every possible moment. Some men even teach Head Start and early childhood parent education classes!

In other words, you don’t have to father the same way as your father or grandfather did. You can be your own kind of Dad. That opportunity is liberating and exciting, but can also be disconcerting. After all, it’s harder to find examples to follow when you’re doing things in a new way.

So if you’re a family professional, work to be aware of these realities for dads and stepdads. They are part of the phenomenon I call “The Dad Factor.” Learn more about it at www.thedadman.com.

Kids Sports Help Families

The Women's Sports Foundation has just released a fascinating report on the positive impact children's sports participation has on the well-being of families.

This report confirms that sports are a resource for U.S. children as well as their families. Children’s athletic participation was associated with higher levels of family satisfaction. Sports and physical activity were also linked with improved physical and emotional health, academic achievement and quality of life for children.

Fathers are key players in getting their children and stepchildren to be physically active--whether in organizes sports or other physical endeavors.

Check out this report, which includes an informative video.

and get more fathering ideas at The Dad Man.